10/9/2025 / One on One & Group

 DMN 

"DMN" is an acronym for multiple concepts, most commonly the Default Mode Network in neuroscience, a brain network active during rest for self-reflection and mind-wandering,

Scott introduced me this concept to explain how this has to do with self-reflection.  My emphasis tonight was on communication. I arrived to the idea of self communication via self-reflection through which DMN moves, when one has complex trauma, towards negative ideation.

 Complex trauma

The child has two needs:

Being cared by his parents

Being able to express my authentic self

 

Group

We are here because we never developed secure attachment. We grew up with an  insecure sense on ourselves. We have a fragmented personality. We need to have someone else in our lives because our insecure attachment. 

What is traumatic is having things happened to you and being alone. We are grieving being alone be cause of the repetition on what we experienced during childhood. 

The story of Leif, Joseph and the big boy in the hood

Leif was asked by the big boy go in to play in the shed in the back. Once there, the big boy pulled his pants down and exposed his erect penis to him. Leif was surprised and left running. 

Joseph, also experiences the situation with the boy. However, instead of being soothed by his parents, hie was ignored, as usual, by his parents. So, he went up to his room and plays a video game to forget about what he just experienced.

They were both sexually abused.

They were bit both traumatized. Leif went home took the experience to his parents who helped him soothe him. He was cared for.

Joseph did not get that. The biggest part of the abuse is being alone after what happened to you.

  Story Engagement Norms

Always stay in in the contest of the story offered

Answer to the level of safety you are feeling

Notice the story teller's facial expressions.


Notice specific words, phrases and pauses in speaking that stand out in the story, specially when they are repeated.

  Leif's Story about his horse

    Leif seems emotional. His breathing seems affected by his story. 

  Scamp, reliable, emotional retch.

What is keeping you from weeping?

Have you ever felt that attuned to a human?

God gifted you with that animal that made you feel alive. 

What would you feel shame being needy?


Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

1/22/26

 Kirk Scared. Trouble with his preaching work. Henry: What is most scary?  Mike He feels it is God's punishment. He does not know why things happen. He knows we are supposed to rejoice. The first word that comes to his mind is punishment . He hopes he can change it.
Read more

2/12 Robert Hill

His Story: Father: Too old for that (breast feeding) Robert: Perfect size nipple, brown aureola His father was a weak man... never tried to win his attention.  He could not individuate from his mother and side with his father... Breast feeding was also comforting to her. His grandparents baby sat him. He reclined on her bosom. He also sucked from her nipples too. As an adult, she, bragged providing that service when his mother was not around. Robert was embarrassed.  He feels disgust now as an adult. Today he is doing better to keep the appropriate boundaries. I wished my father took more authority. He feels a subconscious repulsion when women get close to him. He still wants the relationship with women.   Scott: What do you feel in your body right now? What is the most prominent physical sensation? I feel raw and exposed. He feels even more embarrassed when the cameras are off. He feels angry. Scott: What movement does the anger want. Robert: I want to push all of you gu...
Read more

Scott 10/23/2025

 We spoke about ritual and now important it is to organize therapy around ritual to make it predictable and recurrent. Joseph in hiding a prostitute was creating a trauma bond. Our sexual lives are the truest part of our lives. Because they reveal our deepest desires. a neurobiological imperative is to be touched. So the abused feels the lack of care, connection and play that makes us accessible. The abuser reads our longing. Touch is a survival need. When mom and dad do not satisfy that need and an abuser does.  And how is that evil. You have to honor how your need was paired with sex for you to survive. Scott is sharing his story for us to reflect on it. A Story of Harm with my Mon This is not a report, it is general get to know me. However, the real work is where there it tears, pain, murder. The scene where Michael Corleone kisses his brother in the mouth and says, I know it was you. The betrayal of a sibling. You get into the scene where the heartache lies in the story. H...
Read more